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Poster for Son of the Beach

Son of the Beach

200030mPGstar6.6/10S1:E6 · Fanny and the Professor
Comedy

A parody of "Baywatch" featuring Malibu Adjacent's Notch Johnson, the world's greatest lifeguard (hardly), and his unit SPF-30.

Top Cast

Portrait of Timothy Stack.

Timothy Stack

Notch Johnson

Portrait of Jaime Bergman.

Jaime Bergman

B.J. Cummings

Episodes

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1. With Sex You Get EggrollE1 · With Sex You Get Eggroll · 30m

2000-03-1430m

The Mayor wants Head Lifeguard Notch Johnson out of Malibu Adjacent, and she's recruited Kimberlee Clark to join his squad and get the low-down on him by wearing a mini-camera. She thinks that her work is done when Notch decides to bust enslaved girls from a whore house from the inside, by posing as a customer. If the slavers don't get Notch, the Mayor's video will. Or will Kimberlee help Notch to save the day?

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2. Silence of the ClamsE2 · Silence of the Clams · 30m

2000-03-2130m

A unpopular girl, doesn't have a date for ""Clamapolooza"" in a end party for the college students spring break. She starts to polute the beach to close this event.

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3. In the G-HettoE3 · In the G-Hetto · 30m

2000-03-2830m

When Jamaica is blackmailed into running drugs for a gangsta, Notch insists upon taking her place as the "mule". After all, who else can swallow 13 cocaine-filled condoms and then swim two miles? Also, Chip enters the Mr. Pec pageant. The Mayor's a judge, and she's got a guaranteed way for Chip to win.

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4. Love, Native American StyleE4 · Love, Native American Style · 30m

2000-04-0430m

Notch is distraught when his step-father, local Indian Chief Pokemon, passes on, and a local casino developer convinces the Kahonee Tribe to construct a casino on their land. Although the deal's crooked, Notch is no Indian giver, and he seeks a legal way to halt construction. Also, Chip's South American relatives need money, so Chip moonlights as a male stripper.

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5. Two Thongs Don't Make a RightE5 · Two Thongs Don't Make a Right · 30m

2000-04-1130m

When Little Peter Gozinya disappears on the beach, Notch and the gang mobilize to find him. And also mobilize to repeal the Mayor's ban on thong bikinis. Which effort will prove successful?

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6. Fanny and the ProfessorE6 · Fanny and the Professor · 30m

2000-04-1830m

The Mayor with help from The Professor, plot to take over Notch's job and the beach with three beautiful robot lifeguards.

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7. Eat My MuffinE7 · Eat My Muffin · 30m

2000-08-0130m

When BJ muffs a save, she goes into an identity crisis and ends up in the care of The Divine Rod, who runs a home for lost women. And runs a web-site where people pay to watch the women, and Rod, um, ""treating"" them. Under Notch's direction, Kimberlee infiltrates the cult and snatches it's secret: psychotropic-drug-laced bran muffins. Realizing that BJ is under someone else's control, the bran muffins move Notch into action. Meanwhile, the Tetherball Invitational Tournament is in town, and the Mayor's bet that the gang can win.

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8. Miso HoneiE8 · Miso Honei · 30m

2000-08-0830m

When the world's most dangerous tsunami, Miso Honei, is detected rushing at Malibu Adjacent, the Mayor senses a media event and tries to get Notch to surf it. He refuses until the Mayor grants a parole to the only other surfer capable of surviving the wave, Adolf Manson. Manson's bad boy image wows Malibu Adjacent's impressionable children. Will Notch jump on Miso Honei for the kids and ride it safely to shore? Also, Chip and B.J. fall in love and decide to quit the force.

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9. South of Her BorderE9 · South of Her Border · 30m

2000-08-1530m

When Notch and the girls travel to the South American nation of Humidor to stop a military coup, they end up in prison instead. The shackles aren't so bad, but the all-bean diet? Ai, ai, ai. Can they escape in time to stop the coup? While the others are gone, Chip runs a junior lifeguard program.

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10. Day of the JackassE10 · Day of the Jackass · 30m

2000-08-2230m

Malibu Adjacent is hosting a peace conference between China and Africa, and Notch has been banned from attending. That would be no problem, except Notch's old Army Secret Ops buddy, Captain ""Buck"" Enteneille has shown up and wants to go. It's even more of a problem when Notch sees him going anyway, with a sniper rifle. Can Notch stop Enteneille from ruining the conference, and still keep his friendship with Buck? Tune in. Also, Jamaica falls in love with an African prince.

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11. A Star Is BonedE11 · A Star Is Boned · 30m

2000-08-2930m

The glamour of Hollywood is hitting the beaches of Malibu Adjacent: the fabulous stars, the adoring crowds, the death threats. Notch Johnson joins the case when actress Regina Streep is almost killed on his beach. Can Notch find the assailant before they grab Regina? Also, Jamaica runs a bachelor auction.

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12. Attack of the CocktopussE12 · Attack of the Cocktopuss · 30m

2000-09-0530m

When the Cocktopuss sets shores on the beach, the mayor wants it as another wonder of the world. Chip sings for a rock band.

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13. Mario Putzo's... The Last DongE13 · Mario Putzo's... The Last Dong · 30m

2000-09-1230m

Vinnie Fellachio returns to terrorizes the beach. Chip's sister, Ava Rommel visits him, and puts the moves on B.J.

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